I am so sorry you experienced difficulty with your droplet.
In order to resize your server to a larger size, if it is unavailable under the fast resize option, you should create a snapshot of your server, delete your droplet, and spin up a new server from your image. The IP should be carried over to the new server.
Droplets should not take that long to spin up. If you run into a similar issue, I would recommend opening up a ticket. You can do that here: https://cloud.digitalocean.com/support
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